HINDSIGHT

Today I started to think about Jesus being “The Savior of the World” and what it must have been like to walk with Him…and then this question came to mind…

Why is it so hard for us to see someone’s love while we’re in the middle of it...Isn’t it true that we seem to see it more clearly from the other side, looking back on it?

Let’s take a look at the disciples....Jesus loved them, He chose them. But with His love came discipline, correction and challenges. He set the bar high.

Did they see it? His Love? Really see it? Or was their sight clouded by what they wanted Him to be...who they thought He should be or maybe who they thought they should be with Him?? Was it only when they looked back on Him and His time with them that they saw how much He really loved them??

As I was thinking about this I started to think about my relationship with my mom. During my teens I rebelled. Every part of me was screaming “I know what’s best for me!” I was convinced that my mother was old and she couldn’t possibly know what I was going through. It’s funny how at 16 years old I thought I had the wisdom of a 40 year old. Everything she said seemed controlling, unreasonable and well simply put, ridiculous!

But in her (God given) wisdom she knew her job was to lovingly teach me, correct me, discipline me and challenge me to grow. I knew she loved me but I could not see the depth of her love until I saw it from the other side. When I look back it seems as if it took 20 years to get there!

Then I thought about Jesus? When we see stories of His time here....we see His love, His blood shed, His ultimate sacrifice. But I believe we are able to see it so clearly because we are looking back. Do you think we would have seen it in the same way if we were there with Him? I mean we struggle with seeing Him during our trials here and now. During the storms of life don’t we question whether or not He’s there with us and if He loves us? Then when the storms pass we figure out not only is His love never ending, but He never took His eyes off of us? He is molding us and teaching us how to be the people He intends us to be.

I pray that I not only see love in hindsight, but that I see it in spite of myself and my stubbornness. That I learn more and more each day how to love like He does. And in seeking Him I pray that He teaches me how to love BEFORE, DURING AND AFTER the lessons I am called to learn. And that He affords me the grace of endurance at those times that I am called to be the teacher.

In Jesus name, Amen.

THE FREEDOM OF CHRISTMAS...THROUGH MY EYES

I imagine committing a crime and being sentenced to a suffering of some sort…

Maybe a prison cell….for me this would be the worst kind of suffering. You see I am claustrophobic and even the thought of being confined makes me feel like I’m drowning or in a parked car in August with the windows up and the doors locked shut.

Or perhaps for you, maybe it’s being badly beaten every day by an angry person….or worse, being violated each and every day until you are numb to the very core of your being.

Then imagine one day…out of nowhere…someone you’ve never met steps up and offers to take your place…freely giving it all up for you, surrendering everything to rescue you….

At first you don’t believe it, why would you…its impossible…

Who would do this?

Surely he must want something from me….or why would he do this?

But his answer is simple…..it’s Love.

And you think Love??? I don’t even know Him…and even stranger, you think does he know me? This is crazy…this can’t be real. And you remember all the times you’ve heard someone say “If it sounds too good to be true, it usually is”….

Then one day…you wake up and you’re on the outside of your cell and when you turn back to look inside you see someone lying there wearing your coat…the one you’ve always worn before. He lifts his head, looking up at you he smiles and without words his eyes say to you “I love you, so I took your place. Now go and live forever free…just remember me always…tell people what I’ve done and that I love them as much as I love you…..

Would you do it…tell people?

Would you fall at his feet in gratitude?

Would you forever be grateful knowing that “His law is Love and His Gospel is Peace?”

Would you go as far as to say you would worship him?

Or would you walk away claiming your freedom, forever forgetting this Selfless, Loving, Awesome Man who FREELY gave it all up for you?

Jesus is knocking…answer the door.

He knocked on my door for forty years, waiting patiently for me to answer. When I did, He rescued me from my prison cell and gave me life.

Why would anyone keep that a secret??!!??

WAITING ON GOD

I have waited my whole life for Love. Like most people, I tried to design it myself (more times than I would like to admit).

Besides a few serious relationships, I’ve been engaged five times (yes I said five) and married once. Obviously not only was I looking to be loved…I was looking for someone to fill this hole inside of me. A hole that I came to know as my God shaped hole.

After accepting Jesus in my heart, I decided I wanted to spend my time getting to know Him so I put dating on hold....the more I got to know Him, the more I came to realize that the man in my life would need to be a Godly man. The more I fell in love with Him, the more I realized that the sexiest thing in a man was his love for Jesus.

I prayed and trusted God with my future. And as a “ducks in row” chick, I was sure my God would send me this nice neat package. You know, a Godly man with no kids, little past baggage, and a future in perfect order….SURPRISE! The man He sent me is a Godly man, but the nice neat package thing…not so much. But my Great Big God had a plan from the very beginning.

I discovered that when you follow His lead, He will lead you in ways you have never imagined. Follow Him and He will give you all the desires of your heart. The ones you knew you had, as well as the ones you didn’t dare dream of. Wait on God, and he will blow your mind.

A relationship designed by Him is not about the two people who are in it, it’s about how they will glorify Him together. Loving Jesus first is what matters and everything else follows. I can’t imagine myself ever being able to design a man who adores me, who pursues me and who loves me the way that my Father has. His gift to me shows me how much He loves me.

Worldly relationships are about “How can you make me happy.”

Godly relationships are about “How can we make Him happy together.”

The focus is different, therefore the struggles are different. Making Him happy comes before making your significant other happy. Now the pressure is off of you, because making each other happy becomes His responsibility, not yours.

Being responsible for someone else’s happiness is an expectation God never intended us to have. I trusted Him and He gave me my Greatest Gift. I Love you Smith.

The only way to God?

The statement was…I just don’t believe that Jesus is the only way to God.

The question was….What do you think about that?

The answer is….It makes me sad.

Sad is ….

Believing that God came to earth, put on flesh, allowed himself to be beaten beyond any other human tolerance, flesh ripped from his body, ridiculed, spit on, climbed on a cross, was nailed to it, suffocated and suffered until he died…for you…for me…for EVERYONE. We didn’t earn it or deserve it. He did it because He loves us.

And His death would have been in vain if the statement remains “I just don’t believe that Jesus is the only way to God”

Sadder is….

Going through your whole life never knowing the kind of love that “believing that Jesus is the only way to God” gives you.

My Grown up Christmas Wish

In my quiet time with God today the author of a devotion revealed to me an awesome visual....

Psalm 3:3 But you oh Lord are a shield around me: you are my glory, the One who holds my head high.

Imagine kneeling before God, heads down as we are sinners before the perfect One...He reaches down, puts His Hand beneath our chin and lifts our head. We are now looking directly into the face of God....And by this He shows us His Love, His Grace and His Mercy.

This is my "grown up Christmas wish" for all who do not yet know Him....May all the lost be found......In Jesus Name...Amen

LOOKING FOR GOD IN ALL THE WRONG PLACES “Believer” or “Spiritual” ???

Addiction, don’t know much about it, but God keeps bringing it in front of me. And what I keep seeing is a missing link to recovery….are most in abstinence, instead of recovery?

I believe the missing link is Jesus. This “Spirituality” I keep hearing about is a belief that God is this force that is inside of you. There is this “Flower Child” thing going on, this belief that if you find that spiritual level, all will be good in the hood. Then when “life happens” the fall backwards into old behavior begins, and in that this swallowed god abandons.

To the “Spiritual peeps” Jesus was a great man of God, not God Himself. The belief is that God used many great people to speak through and Jesus was one of them, thereby missing the need for salvation. Totally missing the sacrifice He made for us and the love He has for us. As I see it, putting God in a clear topped box and looking at him through a human lens.

Unbelievers believe that if Jesus is who He said He is then in dying on the cross wouldn’t He have saved us from all the pains of life? My answer to that is in the form of a question….hmmm then wouldn’t we love Him by default? Doesn’t Free Will apply here as well, or does it only apply in areas we want it to? God wants us to love Him in spite of all that life has to offer. He gave us free will and when we as flawed people choose this free will and screw things up, we then want Him to intervene and give us the happy ending we think we deserve. God gave us a perfect world and we brought sin upon it. He loves us through it and stays patient with us, even when we turn our backs on Him. He put on flesh and walked among us, died for us, to make us right with Him again. And He gives us free will to follow Him…not because He makes us or entices us to, but because we believe in Him and what He did for us.

He never said He would undo the mess we made of this fallen world, but He does promise to never leave us or forsake us….Jesus says “If any of you wants to be my follower, you must turn from your selfish ways, take up your cross, and follow me”. Mark 8:34

I believe the danger comes when we think we know more than God. When we don’t realize that we only see part of the picture, but He sees the whole picture.

"Enter through the narrow gate. For wide is the gate and broad is the road that leads to destruction, and many enter through it. 14But small is the gate and narrow the road that leads to life, and only a few find it"...Matthew 7:13-14

"The difficult life is the only life worth living. This narrow gate requires obedience, faith in him, discipline and endurance. Why is it so hard for so many to see this day as a gift? Just walk through the narrow gate so that you might have life in abundance, both in this one and thereafter".

We spin our wheels trying to find peace and inner joy…we walk around putting ego before Jesus. The thought of submitting to Him for so many is impossible and to that I say….SUBMIT! SUBMIT! and listen to this:

"Are you tired? Worn out? Burned out on religion? Come to me. Get away with me and you'll recover your life. I'll show you how to take a real rest. Walk with me and work with me—watch how I do it. Learn the unforced rhythms of grace. I won't lay anything heavy or ill-fitting on you. Keep company with me and you'll learn to live freely and lightly." Matthew 11:28-29….

What do you have to lose??!!

WHEN GOD SHOWS UP

Anyone who knows me, knows that the love of my life was my Cat, Christyanne....who I loved for 18 years.

Many days I wake up missing her, and today was one of those days. I felt especially heavy this morning. I sat on my couch as my coffee was brewing, looking at her picture above my TV and started talking to her. I told her that I miss her and that love that only a kitty cat can give her mommy...I miss hugging her, feeling her laying on my belly and especially feeling her cold nose as she rubbed her little head against me. I cried for a couple of minutes, asked God to help with the pain in my heart, pulled myself together and continued with my day.

Then God showed up big time. Although He could not bring me my Christyanne, He sent the most loving cat to my office door. She showed up out of nowhere. This cat has not left my side. She throws herself against my legs, is climbing on my lap as I am working and yes I get to feel her cold nose as she rubs her little head against my hand. And as I am writing this, she has curled up in a ball on a chair and is fast asleep. A sight I have not seen in 2 years. My heart is full right now.

God has also used this opportunity for me to speak with a lost soul, a stripper, who is staying in the room next door to my office. She has 2 cats with her and having cats in common opened a door for me to talk to her about Him. GO GOD! You never stop amazing me!

THANK YOU GOD FOR SPRINKLING A LITTLE SUNSHINE ON ME TODAY. I LOVE YOU AND THANK YOU FOR REMINDING ME HOW MUCH YOU LOVE ME TOO.